Friday, May 11, 2012

Review: Bill the Vampire by Rick Gualtieri

Bill the Vampire
Rick Gualtieri
Published: June 2011
Formats: Kindle, Paperback

There are reasons we fear the night. He isn't one of them.

Bill Ryder was a dateless dweeb...then he died. Unfortunately for him that was just the beginning of his troubles. He awoke to find himself a vampire, one of the legendary predators of the night. Unfortunately, he was still at the bottom of the food chain.

Now he’s surrounded by creatures more dangerous, not to mention a whole lot cooler, than he is; and they want him dead...permanently this time.

But Bill isn't exactly average. A vampire like him hasn't been seen in centuries. 

He's got a few tricks up his sleeve, unlikely allies, and an attitude problem that makes him too damn obnoxious to quit. 

My Ramblings:

This story was a riot!  It had me laughing a lot at the comments made by our nerdy vampire.  He is not suave, brooding, or sexy.  Actually, he is more like that guy from the movie "Office Space" who couldn't stand for someone to take his stapler.  Okay, I guess he isn't that bad, but you get the point.  
There is an abundance of cursing in it, which is understandable, since Bill died on a date, but still just to warn you.  
Also, I believe this is a book that is geared more towards men than anything.  There is a lot of reference to female body parts; this didn't bother me because I seen the humor in the way these guys were talking, especially when they had no chance in hell.  
The way Bill is made is somewhat of a mistake, but this doesn't keep him from rocking the vampire world and impressing the powers that be to keep him around...for now.  I didn't love the book but I found myself picking up my Kindle and reading a couple of chapters throughout the day.  It is kinda like the bad wreck you see on the road; you don't want to look but your head just goes there anyway.  
There are parts of this book that are slow, some that are way too silly to even be funny, but there were also humorous parts.  
If you are looking for heart wrenching and thought provoking this is not your book.  But if you want a good laugh with nerdy horny newly turned vampire, then definitely give this a try!
I give this 3 hearts!

* received this book from Book Rooster in exchange for a review of it.  

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